Monday, April 24, 2017

Some regrets live forever

How it would be to have a life of no regrets is something I may never ever experience. Having strongly rooted to my past there are many things that I miss experiencing while they just..happen.  The biggest single regret of my life would ever be those simple things that I could’ve done for my dad. He had a passion for trying new things and had enrolled himself to learn Tally software, even few months before he passed away. He was super fond of computers and wanted to explore them as much as he can. I didn’t had the maturity then to understand his passions, nor was I around that time to make it happen for him. For a person, who always put my interests over everything else, he never expressed his desire to me about these and I never bothered to push him to get a system at home or help him out with his aspirations either. I never really understood him till very late in life and he had passed away by, then to correct my mistakes on him. To me, however clichéd or easy-an-excuse it may sound, kids don’t teach parents what they need to do and its always the other way round. Maybe it’s the laziest of all excuses, but I sincerely believed that. How I wish I could take him on a flight journey, show him the usages of a Tab, install software’s for him to use in laptop. Might sound trivial and materialistic to many, but I never saw him experience any of these. I did manage these with my mom, with every single time, both of us remembering how much he would’ve enjoyed and be thrilled by them. Life’s cruelest irony is that maturity comes packaged with hindsight. There are so many things, smaller and simpler and meaningless even, that could’ve meant a world of difference to him. The fact that he may not even have bothered over these things terming them silly, hurts even more to have not done any of them. Probably a note for me to revisit this post down the line when I fail to understand my son. I may or may not be that mature then, at least a written reference from me to myself might help to set things on correct light.

1 comment:

Ramesh said...

Very deep and senti pheelings.

Amen to everything you have said. Everybody faces these questions.