Monday, February 10, 2014

Catch -22 again :)

Possibly my third or fourth post on similar topic in past 8 years :) Guess every 2.5 years I get bored with my way of life. Especially with my career. The moment I feel that I am getting very comfortable with what I am doing I simply cut off all the safety nets and rush headfirst into the unknown. All this bravado might suit someone who is really onto being such a rebel. But unknowns scare me crazy and every single bone in my almost 6 ft body is triple coated lazy. I am not someone who likes change. I would rather prefer steady state forever in my life. But the sheer weight of boredom far outweighs the fear of change and every time I force the change myself. Probably this is one main reason why i'vent made rapid strides up the ladder as compared to my patient friends :) Those who started their career with me are at an embarrassingly higher rank :) I could very well be the Indiana jones of IT. Not for his bravado but we share a common trait in going  after extinct things. I prefer dying or dead technologies that no one prefers just for the joy of knowing something different. All throughout I've been jumping from one tech to another with a tag of being niche. Now that I want to steer my course into the routine crowd, every one around me are donning the doubting Thomas role to perfection. They go out of the way to dig out personality traits in me that wouldn't make me one amongst them. Vanja pugazhchiya fact of lifea nu therila. But as always, its time for change. And it coincides with a major change in my personal life as well. Both changes I've wantonly brought upon myself. The more I think of me as the person responsible for these events in my life, it made me realise how vain I've been. When every single breath that we take in and out is determined by one up above. Suddenly life feels like a chessboard where everyone is a pawn trying to cut across squares to meet the only king called God. Ellamay ennala nadakuthunu yosikarapo saria edukkara decisions and thappa edukkara decisions rendumay stressfulla iruku. Edhukkumay naan karanamilanu yosikarapo feels like zero gravity. Either way, eager to know what the scriptwriter has written in my life :) So here is me praying for a peaceful present and a fearless future :)


Ramesh said...

My friend , I am praying instead for an adventurous life and all sorts of interesting experiences - that is probably what will make you happiest. You are no lazy bum - so steady state is the worst curse that can be spelt on you !!

By the way you are wasting your time in IT. You calling was to be a movie director.

Asha said...

Here's predicting that you can only have a peaceful present and a fearless future:)

Best wishes and congratulations:)