There is a scene in one hindi movie, where the heroine, on a road trip with the hero claims - "I don't want to go back to the place where we came and I don't like where we are going as well. This journey..this road..which seems never ending..this I like. Wish this journey never ends."
Cut to the post.
Being a cynic bordering on satire, under the guise of striving to be near perfect, one might be tempted to ask, what did she like in particular - being the passenger driven by some one, who in fact is the deciding authority on when, to where and how the trip progresses? Or was it the thought of never settling down and be on constant movement, drinking in the joys of nature as is where is? Its getting tad philosophical for a simple dialogue. Yet, that scene really set the thought process behind the post.
I've written few posts on my "close encounters of the bulb kind" with kids. I've always been fond of kids and to quote my BIL, a certified kid tamer (different post for different occasion). But, to put it honestly, i've never spent more than few hours with any of them. Whatever the occasion that presents the opportunity, the experiences and interactions were limited to them. Probably they saw a fancy in me for a limited time pass which made us gel well wouldn't have been an inaccurate statement. What if the kid get to spend much longer time with me? Will we still like each other or get bored of each other? What if that kid happens to be my own? First of all, will I still be able to entertain and entice similar response as how I managed with other kids?
On a parallel note, I started wondering on my relation with my dad. Who else can I compare my situation with, but him is not a misnomer. Did he also go through this phase with me? He was quite popular with kids of all age groups and was a favorite with all of them. Even the neighbors grand kids would easily make friends with him for he was of the pampering kind. Conventional logic states that no two person can continuously like each other all throughout. But here it was not the question of liking and get liked. It was definitely more than few moments of smile and laughter and above all a brand new relationship with a brand new person. I, for one, might be a slate, rubbed clean many times but not so for the kid, to whom it might be the first of many relations he would be forming down the line. Will I be up to the proverbial mark? Probably, most of the guys go through this phase while expecting their first born. There were million more questions and concerns running through mind and every single one of them went blank from the moment the little one came into our life.
He was like a big size guppies fish when I first saw him. So small and soft and reddish pink in color it was scary to even touch him, lest it hurt him. No wonder people call kids a bundle of joy, for he was wrapped in a warm fluffy towel and with multiple layers of cloth when he I lifted him for the first time. For some one who hardly weighed as much as the towel he was wrapped in, the weight of responsibility around him, weighed heavier than anything i had ever lifted. It was the most precious bundle that ever rested on my arms. When I visited him again after few weeks, he would still very well fit right within my fore arms. It was fun watching him sleep, latched on the arm like the most beautiful tattoo ever made. After few months, when he came home to settle, he would still nestle well within the momentary cradle formed with both my arms, happily settling to sleep. Slowly, like the fish in macchavathar, he started to find his feet and is already showing traits of his gran-pa in his taste for food, love for his aunt and in his penchant for having an audience. It was hardly surprising that his first words were "aththai" and next word "thaa thaa". But what was stunning was, my mom, who stays with him for the maximum time of the day, playfully showed him the picture of my dad and introduced him to the word. He caught on with that and would never miss a chance to look at the picture and call "thaa thaa". But for all her cajoling and plead, he is yet to call her "paati". Its "thaa thaa" everyone. Probably, the warmth of a person cannot be contained by a mere frame is my guess.
On the most physically painful day of his life, when he got both his ears pierced, he turned one. Not exactly the best way to start your first birthday. But, he looks like a rock star now, literally and figuratively. May be down the line when he sees all those pics, he might be tempted to think, nothing good comes without pain. If its in my hands, I would try my damnest to make sure, he doesn't have to endure any hardship of any kind. But I would still want him to live his own life, to the fullest, experiencing and learning and in the end, stay true to the name he carries , as that of his gran-pa.
Before he came, couldn't imagine how life would be with him in it, after his arrival, wondering how the hell all those years went by!!!
Happy birthday laddu.